Sivan 27, 5771 * June 29, 2011
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E T H I C S O F O U R F A T H E R S
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Humility: Two Definitions
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Be humble before every man
- Ethics of the Fathers, 4:10
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Let's be realistic.
Is there no one out there who is dumber, uglier or more selfish than yourself? Okay, discount the few dozen degrees of inferiority that are due to your ego-inflated self-perception. Still, is there no one on earth who is less worthy than you?
So what does it mean to "be humble before every man"? Is the Mishnah telling us that it is our moral duty to underrate ourselves?
To do so would be a sinful waste of our G-d-given talents, which can never be optimally realized unless we are aware and appreciative of what we have been given and what we have accomplished. In the words of Rabbi Yosef Yitzchak of Lubavitch: "Just as it is imperative that a person recognize his own shortcomings, it is no less crucial that he recognize his advantages and strengths."
How, then, does a person make a true evaluation of himself, for the worse and for the better, and at the same time experience a genuine feeling of humility before every other individual?
The Larger Picture
Chassidic teaching offers two approaches to develop a true feeling of humility toward someone whose character or behavior is obviously inferior to one's own: 1) the "mutual dependency" approach and 2) the "relative expectation" approach.
The first approach begins with the recognition that we are all one, that together we comprise a single organism whose various cells, limbs and organs complement and complete one another. A body includes both the sophisticated brain and the "crass" functional foot; but, ultimately, the brain is dependent on the foot just as the foot is dependent on the brain. If the foot is indebted to the brain for its vitality and direction, the brain is dependent on the foot to realize many of its goals.
The humble man looks at the larger picture rather than the particulars, at the unified purpose of life on earth rather than only at his function within this purpose. No matter how lofty his own role may seem in relation to his fellow's, he is grossly limited without him. The knowledge that his own life's work is incomplete without his fellow's contribution will arouse feelings of humility and indebtedness toward his fellow: he recognizes that even the coarsest "limb" of the mutual body fulfills a deficiency in himself.
Defining Humility
In this approach, humility is not equated with a sense of inferiority. Rather, it stems from a feeling of equality and mutual need. In becoming humble, a person first realizes that any greater measure of intelligence, refinement, spiritual sensitivity, etc., that he may divine in himself in relation to his fellow is nothing to feel superior about: these are only the tools that have been granted him for his individual role. He also recognizes the limitations of his own accomplishments, and the manner in which they are fulfilled and perfected by the ``body's'' other organs and limbs. So he is humbled by the ability of his inferior fellow to extend and apply their shared mission on earth to areas that lie beyond his individual reach.
The second approach, however, defines "humility" in the more commonplace sense - as a feeling of inferiority in relation to one's fellow.
How is this truly and truthfully achieved in relation to every man? By conducting a thorough evaluation and critique of his own moral and spiritual standing. In doing so, one is certain to find areas where he has failed to prove equal to what is expected of him. That his fellow may be guilty of the same or worse is irrelevant: concerning his fellow's behavior he is in no position to judge. "Do not judge your fellow until you are in his place" say our sages, for you have no way of knowing how his nature, his background, and the circumstances surrounding any given deed may have influenced his behavior. However, regarding your own behavior you are "in his (i.e., your own) place" and in a position to know that, despite all the excuses and justifications you may have, you could have done better.
With such an approach, a person will ``be humble before every man'' in the most literal sense of the term, perceiving his every fellow as superior to himself.
Fighting Fire With Fire
Which approach to take? On the whole, the Torah tells us to accentuate the positive in ourselves. True, soul-searching and self-critique are important, for a person must never delude himself. However, excessive dwelling on one's shortcomings and failures leads to a down-spiraling vortex of depression, despair and inertia, resulting in the very opposite of constructive action.
So, generally speaking, the precept "Be humble before every man" should be employed in the first manner outlined above: not by disparaging oneself in relation to another person, but by recognizing the indispensability of each of one's fellows to the completeness of one's own attainments.
But there is also a time and place for the second approach. The soul of man is a "spark of G-dliness," inherently and utterly good; yet man must also contend with the egocentric drives of his "animal soul." Physical life is basically the struggle between these two selves, between the divine-seeking G-dly self and the material-seeking mundane self.
In the course of this struggle, a person may encounter a lack in his character that proves especially resistant to all his efforts. He may find this negative trait reinforced by a sense that "this is the way it is, there is nothing to be done" - a `humility' and a self-depreciating despair that actually stem from the ego-driven arrogance of his animal self.
In such a case, one must "fight fire with fire" and administer a dose of its own medicine to his animal soul. He must humble himself by contemplating the lowliness of his animal nature, and that his compliance with its drives and arguments renders him inferior to even the lowliest of men.
This is the constructive side to the second approach, to humility as sense of inferiority. For at times, this is the only way for a person to break the arrogant `humility' of his animal self and proceed with the lifelong quest for self-refinement and self-perfection.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Introductory reading to Ethics of the Fathers:
All Israel has a share in the World to Come, as is stated: ``And your people are all righteous; they shall inherit the land forever. They are the shoot of My planting, the work of My hands, in which I take pride.''
(Sanhedrin, 11:1)
Chapter Four
1. Ben Zoma would say: Who is wise? One who learns from every man. As is stated: ``From all my teachers I have grown wise, for Your testimonials are my meditation.''
Who is strong? One who overpowers his inclinations. As is stated, ``Better one who is slow to anger than one with might, one who rules his spirit than the captor of a city.''
Who is rich? One who is satisfied with his lot. As is stated: ``If you eat of toil of your hands, fortunate are you, and good is to you'' ; ``fortunate are you'' in this world, ``and good is to you''---in the World to Come.
Who is honorable, one who honors his fellows. As is stated: ``For to those who honor me, I accord honor; those who scorn me shall be demeaned.''
2. Ben Azzai would say: Run to pursue a minor mitzvah, and flee from a transgression. For a mitzvah brings another mitzvah, and a transgression brings another transgression. For the reward of a mitzvah is a mitzvah, and the reward of transgression is transgression.
3. He would also say: Do not scorn any man, and do not discount anything. For there is no man who has not his hour, and no thing that has not its place.
4. Rabbi Levitas of Yavneh would say: Be very, very humble, for the hope of mortal man is worms.
Rabbi Yochanan the son of Berokah would say: Whoever desecrates the Divine Name covertly, is punished in public. Regarding the desecration of the Name, the malicious and the merely negligent are one and the same.
5. Rabbi Ishmael the son of Rabbi Yossei would say: One who learns Torah in order to teach, is given the opportunity to learn and teach. One who learns in order to do, is given the opportunity to learn, teach, observe and do.
Rabbi Tzaddok would say: Do not separate yourself from the community. Do not act as a counselor-at-law. Do not make the Torah a crown to magnify yourself with, or a spade with which to dig. So would Hillel say: one who make personal use of the crown of Torah shall perish. Hence, one who benefits himself from the words of Torah, removes his life from the world.
6. Rabbi Yossei would say: Whoever honors the Torah, is himself honored by the people; whoever degrades the Torah, is himself degraded by the people.
7. His son, Rabbi Ishmael would say: One who refrains from serving as a judge avoids hatred, thievery and false oaths. One who frivolously hands down rulings is a fool, wicked and arrogant.
8. He would also say: Do not judge alone, for there is none qualified to judge alone, only the One. And do not say, ``You must accept my view,'' for this is their [the majority's] right, not yours.
9. Rabbi Jonathan would say: Whoever fulfills the Torah in poverty, will ultimately fulfill it in wealth; and whoever neglects the Torah in wealth, will ultimately neglect it in poverty.
10. Rabbi Meir would say: Engage minimally in business, and occupy yourself with Torah. Be humble before every man. If you neglect the Torah, there will be many more causes for neglect before you ; if you toil much in Torah, there is much reward to give to you.
11. Rabbi Eliezer the son of Yaakov would say: He who fulfills one mitzvah, acquires for himself one advocate; he who commits one transgression, acquires against himself one accuser. Repentance and good deeds are as a shield against retribution.
Rabbi Yochanan the Sandal-Maker would say: Every gathering that is for the sake of Heaven, will endure; that is not for the sake of Heaven, will not endure.
12. Rabbi Eliezer the son of Shamua would say: The dignity of your student should be as precious to you as your own; the dignity of your colleague, as your awe of your master; and your awe of your master as your awe of Heaven.
13. Rabbi Judah would say: Be careful with your studies, for an error of learning is tantamount to a willful transgression.
Rabbi Shimon would say: There are three crowns--the crown of Torah, the crown of priesthood and the crown of sovereignty--but the crown of good name surmounts them all.
14. Rabbi Nehora'i would say: Exile yourself to a place of Torah; do not say that it will come after you, that your colleagues will help you retain it. Rely not on your own understanding.
15. Rabbi Yannai would say: We have no comprehension of the tranquility of the wicked, nor of the suffering of the righteous.
Rabbi Matya the son of Charash would say: Be first to greet every man. Be a tail to lions, rather than a head to foxes.
16. Rabbi Yaakov would say: This world is comparable to the antechamber before the World to Come. Prepare yourself in the antechamber, so that you may enter the banquet hall.
17. He would also say: A single moment of repentance and good deeds in this world is greater than all of the World to Come. And a single moment of bliss in the World to Come is greater than all of the present world.
18. Rabbi Shimon the son of Elazar would say: Do not appease your friend at the height of his anger; do not comfort him while his dead still lies before him; do not ask him about his vow the moment he makes it ; and do not endeavor to see him at the time of his degradation.
19. Samuel the Small would say: ``When your enemy falls, do not rejoice; when he stumbles, let your heart not be gladdened. Lest G-d see, and it will displeasing in His eyes, and He will turn His wrath from him [to you]''
20. Elisha the son of Avuyah would say: One who learns Torah in his childhood, what is this comparable to? To ink inscribed on fresh paper. One who learns Torah in his old age, what is this comparable to? To ink inscribed on erased paper.
Rabbi Yossei the son of Judah of Kfar HaBavli would say: One who learns Torah from youngsters, whom is he comparable to? To one who eats unripe grapes and drinks [unfermented] wine from the press. One who learns Torah from the old, whom is he comparable to? To one who eats ripened grapes and drinks aged wine.
Said Rabbi Meir: Look not at the vessel, but at what it contains. There are new vessels that are filled with old wine, and old vessels that do not even contain new wine.
21. Rabbi Elazar HaKapor would say: Envy, lust and honor drive a man from the world.
22. He would also say: Those who are born will die, and the dead will live. The living will be judged, to learn, to teach and to comprehend that He is G-d, He is the former, He is the creator, He is the comprehender, He is the judge, He is the witness, he is the plaintiff, and He will judge. Blessed is He, for before Him there is no wrong, no forgetting, no favoritism, and no taking of bribes; know, that everything is according to the reckoning. Let not your heart convince you that the grave is your escape; for against your will you are formed, against your will you are born, against your will you live, against your will you die, and against your will you are destined to give a judgement and accounting before the king, king of all kings, the Holy One, blessed be He.
Studied at the conclusion of each lesson of the Ethics:
Rabbi Chananiah the son of Akashiah would say: G-d desired to merit the people of Israel; therefore, He gave them Torah and mitzvot in abundance. As is stated, ``G-d desired, for sake of his righteousness, that Torah be magnified and made glorious.''
(Makot, 3:16)
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